Why are you so Awesome and Manly?

Today I have been asked what I can only assume to be a heartfelt genuine question from one of my anonymous loyal fans. And since I am such a whore, and it the section for such whoring. I can only accept this questors quest, and answer in heartfelt genuine manner.

Dearest Tony,
How and why are you so awesome and manly, and how can I be more like you.
Demonstrations by paint drawings are preferred.

If it is paint drawings you prefer, it is paint drawings you shall receive. Here is a simple surface level glance down memory lane via MS Paint. Hopefully this will quell that query.

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The time I lit my hand on fire to break stuff in a more "showoffy" way.	The time I drank coke and pop rocks before Mythbusters proved it couldn't kill you.
My dream in life	Me, kicking the crap out of you in tic-tac-toe
I don't remember doing this, but I dream about it most nights, and wake up covered in sweat; with a boner.